Seinfeld Quotes
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“I’ll sniff out a deal. I have a sixth sense.”
“Cheapness is not a sense.”
- George and Jerry, in “The Reverse Peephole”
“I hate rental cars. Nothin’ ever works: the window doesn’t work, the radio doesn’t work… and it smells like a cheap hooker… Or is that you?”
“Gimme ten bucks and find out…”
– Jerry and Elaine, en route to “The Airport”
“I don’t know about you, but I’m getting sick of pretending to be excited every time it’s somebody’s birthday, you know what I mean? What is the big deal? How many times do we have to celebrate that someone was born? Every year, over and over… All you did was not die for twelve months. That’s all you’ve done, as far as I can tell.”
- Jerry’s opening monologue, “The Outing”
Jerry: Damn it, they gave me cream! I asked for nonfat milk!
Patty: I think they have 1% over there.
Jerry: 1%?! They can kiss 1% of my ass!
Patty: OK, Jerry, enough. I’m not buying it.
Jerry: You’re damn right you’re not buying it!
– Patty and Jerry, arguing in “The Serenity Now”
